Welcome to my new website! I am so thrilled that you’re here. Really, truly and sincerely. This “space” is an amalgam of tons of thought, designs and words turfed, and new possibilities realized and embraced. It marks the end of me hiding behind a clever concept (Board of Your Life) and invites all that I am becoming. In this way, I am now free to live my own brand…sigh…that’s truly lovely for me to write.

Getting to this launch was not without its own unique set of challenges. Not from my peeps, mind you. D’NA showed up in their glory and did the design, development and photography in wicked time like the pros that they are. I was the challenge. My Type A side clashed mightily with my Type L (Lazy) side. At times I wanted to manage every minute detail and at other times, I wanted to just eat Cherry Garcia  and have someone else sort out who and what I am.

I had intended to launch the new site by September 28 (as a birthday gift to myself). I am a month late. I am okay with that…ONLY because Type A reminds me what we’ve learned about launching can be shared with you all.

How to launch anything (your business, your book, your BIG idea, your plan, your new direction etc)

1. Connect with the WHY of what you’re about to do. What is the desired emotion of accomplishing what you’re about to launch. What’s it going to give you? Set your intention in stone and then don’t let it drop.
2. There are many steps to take when launching anything. You will get bogged down in the details if you so choose. Recognize that this is your prerogative. And as you put up road block after road block, ask yourself why you’re still in your own damned way. Then politely ask yourself to please get the hell off the road…progress wants to happen.
3. Stop waiting to be READY. You’re smart. You’ve done your due diligence. You know this idea of yours is viable, resonant and that the desired emotion gives you goosebumps. You are probably already 90% there. That’s an A plus grade…good enough to get into most colleges and universities for goodness sake, but not good enough for you, eh? GET OVER YOURSELF! The world wants you to unleash your own brand of genius on us all! If you wait for 100% ready the boat may have sailed…and you’re stuck alone at the port, champagne bottle unsmashed. Reserve the word “ready” for cooking chicken to make sure you’re not poisoning family and friends with salmonella.
4. Trust your instincts…you are wiser than you know. AND be prepared to turn on a dime… As Seth Godin says in his book, The Dip, “Fail fast.” Find the way to be attached to the plan and yet, NOT à la fois. This is the secret of the successful entrepreneur who knows all about dichotomies. Know that you can always reframe, repurpose and reinvent. Version 2.0 is always slicker, sharper, smarter and savvier. But there needed to be a 1.0 first. The heart of the idea will remain…it’s the execution that may evolve.

So with this, I invite you to connect with what’s sitting at the very top of your heart…the thing that is ready to bust on out. It really wants to.

Again, welcome to my very own launch party. I am thrilled that you are here…please poke around, check out the pages and meet some people who have showed up for interviews.

And no party is complete without a loot bag…so before you go, please take this with you: to celebrate the launch of my website, I am offering twenty-five people who want to LAUNCH something (anything…big or small) a 45-minute coaching session. Just contact me and we can set it up. Please tell your friends.

Thanks for coming.

TG

PS – Oh…and while we’re celebrating, my dear friend Catherine Porter just launched her new column in The Toronto Star today – Woman’s Work. Funny, quirky, whip-smart and sleep-deprived…you’ll love her too.

I am all about starting, launching and getting going. Propulsion thrills me. Velocity thrills me. “Your best you. Starting now”, remember?

So, while I’m a big starter, I’m also pretty fascinated by those who are big FINISHERS. Enter the fabulous, inspiring and über-cool Dyana Valentine. Her motto? “Helping self-starters self-finish: one project at a time”.

She’s been on my radar for a while, though it wasn’t until she issued a challenge that I decided to say “howdy”. Her challenge : 40 Days of Our Bodies – a commitment to tending to our bodies for 40 days and noticing the shifts that arise.

I decided to jump on in with committing to 40 days of yoga. No small feat, right? Hatha = hard. Here’s the kicker though. I LOVE yoga. Making room for a daily practice is a challenge, yes, but I started to feel that I was cheating myself out of the substance of this exercise…kinda like a vegan giving up liver and onions for Lent. So I looked a little deeper and I didn’t much care for what I saw…which is precisely when I discovered what I had to do.

On October 3^rd, I decided to give up the smokes. FOR GOOD. Yup…that’s right. I had been smoking “socially” for the past two years (again). It pains me to type those words: inner monologue goes something like “you should have known better”; “how can you coach people towards self-care if you weren’t walking the talk”; “yucky stinky” and so on.

But self-imposed judgment doesn’t ever work too well with me (which is why I hadn’t managed to REALLY quit before). Here’s what does work for me:

1. A good and resonant reason…love. I am 37. My mother died at 59. I am madly in love with my family…and I do not want to cheat them out of ME and what I bring to this life. Ain’t nothing more resonant for me than love.
2. A good challenge…with accountabilities built in. I shared with Dyana and she’s been a valued source of support, inspiration and giggles. I knew she wouldn’t let me fall. And she won’t.

Am on Day 20. Half-way through Ms D’s  challenge…and 20 days into a new and freer chapter in my blessed life.

What do you need to be finished with so that you can get started on your new path?

What a fabulous word…it’s succulent, sexy and yet somehow soulful. Yes, I am a sucker for alliterations, but I do love this word and its ambiguities. You can’t utter it without inferring “yes” and yet, the inherent question is “what do you need to say yes to in order to succeed?”. Early morning musings after a late night, to be sure…but I do wonder…what is success to you? To some, it may be all about the benjamins. For others, a spiritual renaissance.

While I am still blissfully defining and refining my own version of truth about success, I do know that by all accounts, last night’s Coach Buffet in Montreal was indeed a success. How do I know? I saw it in the faces of the clients and coaches, felt the energy in my scalp and toes, and read the glowing feedback forms from everyone involved.

There is no one secret to success (just google that and you’ll see that there are ostensibly 106,000,000 secrets). But for Coach Buffet, there were 3 very good reasons…none of them a secret:

• WHAT – It is an excellent idea. Props here to Lisa for conceiving of it…she asked me to partner early along and we coached each other to the place of making it happen, but success does indeed come from innovation. People are hungry to learn about coaching and Coach Buffet is the perfect place to sample different “flavours” of coaching styles. Lisa was right…as she often is.

• HOW – We worked hard…this is a core value for both of us. We clocked several hundred hours executing the strategy. Period. And managed to keep it fun and are still the best of friends.

• WHO – We needed two types of people to say “yes” to this event to make it a sucess and we are ever-so-grateful:

• a) We promised high-calibre Montreal coaches and by George, we delivered high-calibre Montreal coaches.  Julie, Amanda, Martine, Marie-Claude, Michele, Roch, Anne, Ian, Minnie, Corry ,  Louis and Alain are some of the finest coaches I’ve had the pleasure of working with. They helped promote the event and showed up last night with full intention of serving the participants’ needs. Their powerful coaching (even in short increments) absolutely blew the top off of the joint.
• b) The participants who came out…a beautiful group of pioneers.  This had never been done before and yet they trusted the guiding force of their intuition that there was something for them in this evening. And resoundingly, it looks like they got what they came for. Bravo to the fearless and the brave early adopters!!!

So, I leave Montreal this morning, unabashedly basking in the glow of success for a job well done…and excited to refine for Toronto’s Coach Buffet on November 17^th. We do hope you’ll come out, hungry for possibility and even, if you can imagine, just a little bit more.

You’ve been here often enough to know that I am ALL about gratitude. For rejoicing in the many gifts that I’ve been given and hopefully spreading that gratitude around. So, of COURSE, Thanksgiving is one of my favourite holidays of the year. What’s not to love? Cool crisp days, warm cozy homes filled with the smells of sage and onion stuffing, wine, family, autumnal decorations and a festive note in our hearts.

Here’s the problem. We gorge. We overdo it. Too much stuffing. Too much wine. Too much pressure to pull it all off. Heck, even too much family (yup, I dared say it….now please read on for the reframe). What I mean here is that it’s a hectic, crazy blur. Look outside your window right now…do you see any life? NO, because everyone’s on their couch rubbing their bellies with the phones turned off and watching the Seinfeld marathon on TV Tropolis. It was all too much to handle.

There must be another way. A softer, more moderate display of our gratitude for what we all have in abundance. Other ways to tell family that we love them and that we care: more frequent (and shorter?) visits. A little less butter on the turkey skin (uh-huh…1200 calories per serving…we did the math). One less bottle of wine. A little more chatting and one less side dish.

I am grateful for much…and choose to tune into it all on a daily basis, rather than binging on it over one weekend in October.

And now, I’m off to make a sandwich and see what the gang in Manhattan’s up to these days…but will leave my phone on in case family wants to talk.

Every once in a while, you meet a really bright spark that you know will become (if they haven’t already) a really big bonfire…the kind everyone wants to warm up by over great conversation and maybe even some beers. I met such a spark on January 26, 2009. Her name is Carla Langhorst and she was the most welcome rush of warmth and energy in an otherwise cold and gray room (I do disdain networking functions…or at least…did back then…now I’ve found a way to make them fun).

She introduced herself as a “self-employed consultant” and at the time, I didn’t realize that this was a big shift for her to introduce herself in that way. Over the past months, I have reveled in her progress, her success and her friendship. She is a woman to watch. Here’s why:

• She is the wisest 29 year old I’ve ever met.
• She just earned her MBA.
• She just launched a book called “Will it Fly: And Idea Tester” which is an important read for anyone with a vision and an uncertainty about its viability (and invited me to speak at the launch party…told you she was cool).
• She is hilarious.
• She has a consulting business called Make it Fly that is simply bursting at the seams.
• This month she launches a new site called: smallbusinesssolver.com which was created for small business owners who may not be able to afford a business consultant’s wages. It was also borne out of her connection with herself and her values. Smart, smart woman. She knew that as successful (and here, I mean bucks) as she will continue to be as a business advisor, that she was likely not going to be satisfied in the long term helping people with the same problems and the same answers. She likes greater variety and wanted a product that could reach everyone…not just those who can pay top dollar. The Small Business Solver is a program that represents tons of research and interviews with small business owners (yours truly included) to tap into what their needs are…and the solutions. Do check it out…even if you don’t sign up, you will learn some aspects about your business that you may not have considered.  She’s very very very generous that way.
• She has great shoes.
• She is a world traveler.
• She is a natural and giving connector and if you ever get the chance to sit down with her and talk about life, love, success and all things glorious, you’ll feel grateful to have her at your table.

I wanted to write about her because you know how I love to talk about people who step into their greatness. I also like to write about people who are tapped into their values. And I wanted to post about her today (September 30, 2009) for two reason:

1. I believe in helping to build the businesses of those I dig and smallbusinesssolver.com launches this month (October 15^th, 2009). Yahoo!!!
2. On this day last year, she almost died en route to Tibet…elevation sickness. Twelve hours away from a hospital, she went into a coma for 5 hours and when she awoke, the only person who spoke English told her that they didn’t think she’d walk for at least three days…what with her temperature of 106 degree temperature and all. Call me sentimental, but I thought that story bore telling.

Here’s some insight that she shared about herself in an e-terview.

You are someone that I admire…who do you admire and why?

I admire my best friend. She is a rock.  She is one of those people who knows herself, knows what she stands for, and lives up to it every single time.  She believes in being good.  She is rather quiet, but she shines because she is comfortable with herself and is extremely happy because of this. I think that it is probably easier to be happy when you are being true to who you are – and she pulls it off better than anyone.

You are an idea tester. What is the greatest idea that you’ve come across (perhaps one that you wish you had have come up with) and what might you have done differently?

The greatest idea?  It is so tough to judge as it depends on the criteria of a great idea. I generally judge ideas on how they fit the people who want to push them forward. Often an idea doesn’t fit a person’s salary expectations, the number of hours they want to work, or their own strengths.

But to just judge an idea on its own, you have to know what the criteria of best is.  If the criteria is money (which is the traditional view of a “good” idea), I would say that casinos are great. I wanted to own one since I was 10. How would I do it differently?  My casino would go after a different niche – women.  All of the men serving drinks would wear revealing clothing, and the night entertainment would be significantly different. Instead of free cigars, maybe free manicures.  I haven’t narrowed in on a name, but maybe Cougar’s Palace. If the criteria is giving back, a neat concept, cool technology, or promoting sustainability, the best idea would be completely different.  I think that to figure out what is the “best idea”, people need to start with what is important to them. (ed note: DING DING DING!!!!!)

Was there a moment in your life that you can say “turned it around” for you (life, business or otherwise?)

No. There are many. I think that life is full of paradigm shifts.  The key is that each one should bring you to a new (and better) viewpoint.  Not to say that you can’t take a step back every once and again.  I took a step back last week. But the key is to keep striving for the next viewpoint and turning bad times into learning points.  Everyone has good and bad moments, that’s the charming part of life.

One paradigm shift that sticks out in my mind was when I first met you.  Everyone at the networking event didn’t seem that interested in speaking to an unemployed graduate student.  I kept having playbacks in my mind of headhunters telling me how many companies were on hiring freezes and the job offers I was getting were 50% below the offers given before the economic downturn.  And the shift hit me.  I had been in sales, I believed in the product which was me, why not sell that and become self-employed? That’s the exact moment you walked up to me and introduced yourself.  I responded, “I’m Carla, and I’m a self-employed consultant”.

What is the one word that guides all that you do?

“Fun” was my first reaction.  I basically live each moment, and fully enjoy each moment.  I figure I only live once – and if that is the case, I should have no regrets.  But you really can’t have fun, or at least appreciate it, without the other – connection with other people.  And I think the strongest connector is giving to others and caring about others. So I try to make sure that that is central in things I do.

What are you always giving away and what does that give you?

Anything I can really.  I make it a priority to do one good turn a day.  This can be as simple as smiling at a stranger, telling a woman on the street that she has excellent shoes, or something more involved such as pushing someone to a homeless shelter in a wheelchair for 2kms. I find that I give 30% of my time away to people.  In the end, most of my clients are a result of having done a good turn somewhere else in my life.  I think the important thing is not expecting that or taking it for granted.

Beyond the launch of smallbusinesssolver.com this month, what’s next for Carla Langhorst?

I wonder that myself. I do have a dream to write a second book during a 3 month backpack tour of South America.  But that is 2 1/2 years out from now.  Right now I want to focus on smallbusinesssolver.com.  I want people to know about it as I think that it is going to help a lot of people out there, but I also want to make it better. I know that there is a ton of potential for this tool, and I want to get it there. Imagine if the percentage of small businesses that fail was reduced to 25% – how much more creative and competitive would Canada be?  How much better would the world be if a country with so much potential could flex its creativity muscles?  I think that I’m going to keep coming up with ways to do that.  Why not have a dream?

On her first day of MBA classes, the professor said: “Live like you’ll die tomorrow and learn like you’ll live forever”. Carla was listening…and so should we.

I am enjoying a wonderful birthday today. And why wouldn’t I? I was feted by my family over the weekend, and both my husband and I have booked ourselves off for the day. First order of business? Latte…then moksha yoga. Deliciously hot. Our instructor kicked off final savasana today with a famous quote from Theodore Roosevelt. It spoke to me (and not just because I was bathed in sweat) and I wanted to share it with you.

It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.

“Citizenship in a Republic,”
Speech at the Sorbonne, Paris, April 23, 1910

For my birthday, I ask that you be kind to yourself too…and know that it’s okay to come up short time and time again.

Off to feast on oysters for lunch now. Yup, it’s a good day to be me.

Know people who are stuck in the nineties? Who really think that Melrose Place being on the air was the pinnacle of good times? That somehow they were part of that campy troupe of styling blondes saying drivel like “nothing like a cold chardonnay on a hot summer night” with zero trace of irony? Melrose Place is coming back…and I fear for those who think it will be the same. Because it won’t be. Not even close. The actors are different, the writers are different and here’s the kicker, like it or not, the viewer who’s been pining for its return is different.

Our ten-year wedding anniversary is coming up on Friday. It has been a beautiful marriage with lots of laughter and love on the one hand and some pain AND growth on the other.  There is so very much to celebrate and as life would have it, for lots of reasons, we aren’t able to celebrate it in the way we’d like to…we WILL make the space and time to do it up right, it just won’t be next weekend.

So it was with a LITTLE bit of a heavy heart that I went back to the scene of the wedding reception. You see, Coach Buffet Toronto is coming up on November 17^th and we need just the right place for our unique venue needs: three distinct spaces for the one-on-one coaching, workshops, and mingling to happen.  I had not as yet found the perfect spot.

I walked in the room with a slight bit of uncertainty…I didn’t really know what to expect. Would I be greeted by the happy ghosts from 10 years ago…the jazz trio’s music wafting through the halls, the laughter and excitement that only a happy occasion like a wedding brings and the air of expectations for a perfect life?

In a way, I guess I was kind of afraid to go back…because I don’t ever want to live in the past. And as I walked through the virtually unchanged space, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror that I fixed my complicated ‘do in 10 years earlier. I am no longer that young bride filled with dreams of how happily ever afters work. And that’s good. What I saw in my reflection was a different woman…still confident in the inherent goodness of the world, a steadfast believer in the power of positivity, and filled with a different brand of dream, but slightly more pragmatic, slightly more wrinkled and a hell of a lot more empowered. And that is even better.

Our wedding day was a beautiful day. As is today. As will tomorrow be. There is no need to go back to capture that beauty.

So, I am happy, nay, thrilled to announce that Coach Buffet Toronto will be held at University of Toronto’s Faculty Club. A beautiful space with neither too much pomp, nor circumstance, but with the right peppering of Group of Seven paintings and a cool academic vibe.

Moreover, I am thrilled that 10 years later, my husband will be there with me, by my side. We are different now, and that’s good.

And for you hard core Melrose Place aficionados, that lousy smug Michael may not be back, but enjoy the new and different show.

You are glorious, do you know that? I just thought we should get that right out in the open. You are beautiful, creative, resourceful and whole and there’s not a thing wrong with you.

No truer words have ever been spoken. For real.

So, given that we know the above to be the truth, why do you figure that you aren’t achieving the results in your life that you seek (and results here can mean bucks, acknowledgment, mojo, enlightenment, peace, flow, joy, a grammy, tranquility or whatever your guiding force may be)?

Upon completion of all of my Board of Your Life programs and at the end of a coaching relationship (when the birds fly from my loving nest to soar…sniff), I ask for feedback. Why? Quite simply, I like to hear what rocked my clients (so I can continue to do the same for others…AND because it sounds so nice). I also *want* to learn what wasn’t so impactful. And that part is hard…no matter how “non-attached” and zen-like I intend to be.

I was introduced some time ago to the simple method of gleaning feedback: “Start, continue and stop”. What should I start doing? What should I continue doing? What should I (…inhale deeply…) stop doing?

Peter Drucker once said, “Half the leaders I have met do not need to learn what to do. They need to learn what to stop.” Yup.

Starting’s easy when you have a good reason to get going. Continuing is dead simple if you’ve got momentum working for you. It’s the stopping that is terrifying. What happens when you stop doing something? The fear of having to start something new to replace the stopped something can be brutally scary. Few people like change…and fewer still like to change.

To get where you know you want to go, what do you need to start doing, to continue doing and to STOP doing? (And, here’s the trick..you can do it all and still be your glorious you.)

As long as I can remember, I’ve been experimenting with food. Some flops – I seem to recall an ill-fated melba toast in the toaster (yup, flames and all) and some winners for my grade-school palate (chocolate ice cream sprinkled with iced tea crystals; grapefruit stands with any topping you could think of; fresh fall apples with molasses). All of my experimenting was done with equally culino-curious friends.

The joy was in the collaboration, the excitement of trying something new and the anticipation of the results.

And so, I am thrilled to be in the kitchen (so to speak) yet again with my dear friend and colleague, Lisa Chandler. She conceived of the idea for an innovative coaching event and asked me to help tweak it. With a dash of this and a pinch of that, Coach Buffet was created…in the most delicious way (and with a delightful logo, thanks to Stephen Caissie).

Coach Buffet is a fun, innovative event that was concocted to bring a dozen powerful life and business coaches together with participants for meaningful one-on-one coaching conversations in a social evening format.

Sampling different types of coaching styles = buffet…get it?

This event is perfect for professionals and business owners who feel stuck in some aspect of business, career or life in general and who are hungry for possibilities.

Our first ever will be in Montreal on October 15th and will be followed up in Toronto on November 17th.

For Montreal, our array of coaches is sumptuous (by mid September, you can read all their bios on the site) and our venue is exquisite. I can assure you that powerful coaching will take place and strong relationships will form. As we say at Coach Buffet:

We are serving possibility….Are you hungry??

Register now at www.coachbuffet.com. Spaces are limited!

Believe in magic or not, we all know what it’s about. The awe-induced experience of witnessing something momentous…and wanting to be a better person because of it. No matter what it is.

My magical top 7 (in no order whatsoever)
1. shooting stars – to see one means that you’ve a) been patiently keeping your gaze up and not at your feet or b) you’ve had dumb luck.
2. dumb luck – this happens…a lot. Sadly, it’s the hope that this will befall us that can keep us small…think lotto dreams. Then again, think lotto dreams and replace “lotto” with “blue sky”…and now what’s available? Now what is your subconscious working on? If it’s real and authentic, you’ll find a way to make it happen…clarity is the key.
3. love – can’t see it, hear it, taste it, or touch it…but man, can you feel it when it’s real and genuine.
4. new beginnings – there’s always a chance to turn the bus around….especially if you have the right people sitting with you.
5. music - for me, there is nothing like music to lift me up if I need to be lifted, or brought to earth if I need the grounding. I love it all…except for rinky-dink noodly jazz…that just makes me mad. But make a recommendation and I may turn that around too…may be another new beginning.
6. coaching - working with people committed to making real, tangible and significant changes…for themselves and ultimately, the world around them…sheer inspiration and an honour to witness.
7. the smell of oleanders – poetry in a fragrance

Why only 7? I love the magic of having room for more. I intend to keep adding, so please send me some of your thoughts…magic is to be shared.