What I remembered about EVERYTHING from my Board of Your Life Experience
This post (with the grade school title) has taken me over four weeks to write. Not because it’s that long (should only take you, like, three minutes to read) but because I’ve had so much to unpack since August 4th. That was the day of my first ever Board of Your Life session. As in ME. I HAD the Board of Your LifeTM session. I’ve facilitated plenty and have walked 100’s of people through their own experience using the Board of Your Life kit, but I have never actually treated myself to the full meal deal.
And it was full, all right. Like a towering buffet, laden with the most succulent splendour. Like perfectly steamed vegetables glistening like gems of every colour. Like endless trays of lusciously ripe fruits and platters of (sustainable!) seafood and, and, and….beyond.
Yes. It was full like THAT. Nourishing. Abundant. Sustaining. Delicious.
But even more than nourishing and abundant and sustaining and delicious…it felt essential. Like, OXYGEN essential.
Let me back up in case you don’t know what Board of Your Lifeis.
It’s a process, a focus group, a fusion of coaching and brainstorming and heartstorming and barn-raising for your soul that I created long before I even knew what coaching was. It's an exquisite immersion in who you are, what you're great at, how you're showing up and what's next. To start.
And creating it LEAD me to coaching back in 2008. It’s extremely powerful stuff. But once again? It feels essential. Oxygen essential.
Like, if-we-lived-in-a-medicine-culture-and-you-lost-your-ability-to-make-your-medicine-it-would-behoove-us-all-to-help-you-to-find-your-medicine-again, essential.
And it’s taken me over four weeks to write about it because what I learned about myself in that two hour session will sustain me for a lifetime.
(I say “learned”, but I really mean “remembered”. I say “remembered”, but I really mean “reclaimed”.)
It has already shifted the way I make decisions. It has shifted the way I write, parent, coach, learn, create. It has shifted where I see myself now and where I see myself GOING.
It has shifted my relationship with myself.
It has shifted…everything.
I’ll write plenty more on that when the time is right, but for the moment, I want to share what I learned about the experience because I want so deeply for you to have this experience too.
So, without further ado, here’s what Board of Your Life reminded me. About everything.
Your people want you to succeed.
I didn’t set out to hold a Board of Your Life session for myself, you know. But in a call with my mastermind group of super star sisters, it became clear to me that I had, as above, lost some ingredients to the medicine I am here to make. So they reminded me that I had JUSSSST the thing for that in my bag of tricks. That my very own Board of Your Life process was precisely the answer to my questions that had me fumbling around in the darkness of my blind spots.
And that THEY were the ones to light the way. To remind me of who I am. To reflect back the parts of me that I'd tucked away. And they were. And they did.
Your people will show up. BECAUSE.IT.MATTERS.
Julie, powerful and masterful teacher, elected to be my facilitator. Guided by the Fabulous Facilitators' Guide found in the kit, she went above and beyond, imagining every possible outcome, crafting the bespoke experience. She wanted so much and so deeply for me that I could sense her (HER!) nervousness when we began. Ever so subtle. But reminding me, no matter how accomplished and skilled we are that if this matters? You WILL feel nervous. Fact. The Imposter Complex wants to have us believing something else, but that right there is the truth. Nerves show up to show you what matters.
Kate was having trouble getting into the Google hangout, so she went, like, live and in person, to Lauren’s house. She wasn’t gonna miss it. Because it mattered.
Randi was having audio issues but made sure her voice was heard loud and proud (oh, how it was).Amy reached deep into her marrow to offer me up treat after treat. Ronna’s eyes filled with love and knowing told me a lifetime of seeing. Because it mattered.
They showed up. They SHOWED UP. Because of who I am, because of who they are and because of their sheer desire to help me to see myself. Fully. Because it mattered.
Transformation can be extremely fun.
(Whaaaaaa? Yes. It can.)
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When I arrived in the private Facebook group dedicated to me (ME!) I used the first of eight tissues that day. It was like a surprise party in my honour that I already knew all about. I felt the virtual confetti on my cheeks. And the Pinterest Board created and dedicated to their dreams, hopes and visions for me is up there with a picture of my husband and daughter on vacation for my most cherished image on my laptop.
We laughed (a lot).
We are consistently and persistently and unnecessarily hard on ourselves.
Nothing new under the sun here, my friends. But as the Creator of the Board of Your Life process, I was overtly, painfully cognizant of how some of the exercises and prompts in the kit felt outdated. To ME. (You know that feeling when you’ve been living inside of your head, of your content, of your process for so long you feel it’s old and tired…to you?) But they weren’t. The exercises and prompts were perfect for my session. And felt fresh. And new. And insightful. And I just needed to get over it and trust the process that I had created from my deep well of knowing so many years ago. (Your well is just as deep, Love.)
Stepping up for yourself ain’t no small thing.
Board of Your Life is indeed delicious…but it’s not all luscious fruits and confetti. And in stone cold truth, it’s not for the faint of heart. But it’s for those who are no longer content to fumble around.
About a month before I met the brilliant Selena Soo in NYC this summer, I’d heard her being interviewed by Andrew Warner of Mixergy. He’s a tough interviewer and was asking some pretty pointed questions about how she’s managed to realize the quantum leaps in her business that she has.
She told him that she'd held a focus group, inviting some leaders she respected and trusted and admired. Ramit Sethi. Derek Halpern. It sounded much like Board of You Life (it wasn’t, but it held the same intentions.) They offered her some perspectives that were the grease lightning for her in her business.
Smart. Not easy, per se. But smart.
In truth, there were moments when it was a little hard to breathe. How much more could I hold? I noticed the places where I wanted to hide behind note-taking. (Unnecessary…Lauren was scribing like the secrets of the universe were found in our words.) As above, I noticed where I wanted to make the content wrong. Where I wanted to manage the saboteurs of the group, or remind my Board members that the light that they saw in me was merely a reflection of them (which is truth). Also true: these tactics were mere distractions to shield me from the brightness that was being illuminated for me. The brightness that is calling me forth…to step up.
Because as Julie so exquisitely said:
It feels like Board of Your Life is an opportunity to (re)construct a mirror of who we truly are - a mirror that is fragmented because none of us can really see the totality of who and what we are, and mirroring is essential to coming to sense it.
Which, like I said, feels essential. And worth it.
So, you’re going to see me make some changes around here in my business. Like new offerings (including an immersive one day coaching experience with me, and retreats, and, and...) you’ll know they came from my Board of Your Life experience. But most of all, when you see me shining fully and truthfully, you’ll be able to trace it back to August 4th, 2015.
And finally, as I share in 12 Lies of the Imposter Complex (and One Truth):
There’s room for improvement.
Absolutely, there is.
For me. For you. And for Board of Your Life, the PROCESS.
This much I do know with every fibre of my being: Your people want you to succeed. Let them help you.
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